A friend of mine—who've I've mentioned in the blog before—is getting married this weekend. But on a business trip a few weeks ago, she had what she's referred to as her "last platonic fling." Basically, she met a C list celebrity, spent the night flirting with him, and got all tingly inside,. But did not pursue anything more—not even a kiss. Even though she wanted to. Even though she still thinks about him. She admits that had she been single (and not so in love with her fiance) she totally would have made out with this guy. But her platonic fling has lifted her mood for a the past coule of days...well, she's actually been floating on a cloud. It reminded me of my own kinda, sorta platonic fling:
When I was engaged, I went to another friend's crazy out of town bachelorette party. I drank and smoked dubious amounts of marijuana for several days. On that third day of party insanity, I found myself flirting with the cutest guy and doing shots of cointreau (gag!). As the night and our conversation wore on, I was more and more attracted to him. At that moment, I longed for a good, drunken, public makeout session, that was par for the course on a Saturday night in my 20s. In my drunken, drugged out haze, I said to the guy, who I knew was married, and who knew I was engaged, "If you want to kiss me, I'll let you. But it can only be the one kiss. That's it."
But he grabbed my hands and said, "Thank you. I would love to. Really. There is nothing right now that I would want to do more." I smiled and batted my lashes, waiting for my smooch.
"But, I have a 3 month old daughter at home and I just can't. I can't do it. I'm sorry. But thanks for the offer—it made my night," he continued.
I wanted to throw up. Maybe it was the shots of cointreau (enough to make even the most steel-stomached person puke). But I think it was the rejection. Combined with the sobering realization of what I had just proposed to this man and what would have happened had he taken me up on my offer.
So my question is this: Is there such a thing as an "innocent flirtaton"? When does it cross the line? And would kissing that guy (or if my friend smooched the celebrity) would really have been that bad?
Better yet—did you have a final fling before you got hitched? If so, do you regret it, or are you happy you cashed in when you still had the chance?
When I was engaged, I went to another friend's crazy out of town bachelorette party. I drank and smoked dubious amounts of marijuana for several days. On that third day of party insanity, I found myself flirting with the cutest guy and doing shots of cointreau (gag!). As the night and our conversation wore on, I was more and more attracted to him. At that moment, I longed for a good, drunken, public makeout session, that was par for the course on a Saturday night in my 20s. In my drunken, drugged out haze, I said to the guy, who I knew was married, and who knew I was engaged, "If you want to kiss me, I'll let you. But it can only be the one kiss. That's it."
But he grabbed my hands and said, "Thank you. I would love to. Really. There is nothing right now that I would want to do more." I smiled and batted my lashes, waiting for my smooch.
"But, I have a 3 month old daughter at home and I just can't. I can't do it. I'm sorry. But thanks for the offer—it made my night," he continued.
I wanted to throw up. Maybe it was the shots of cointreau (enough to make even the most steel-stomached person puke). But I think it was the rejection. Combined with the sobering realization of what I had just proposed to this man and what would have happened had he taken me up on my offer.
So my question is this: Is there such a thing as an "innocent flirtaton"? When does it cross the line? And would kissing that guy (or if my friend smooched the celebrity) would really have been that bad?
Better yet—did you have a final fling before you got hitched? If so, do you regret it, or are you happy you cashed in when you still had the chance?
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